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What People with High EQ Say in "The Name of the People"

Source of information: Time: 2020-02-21 02:14:16

Millennium Tongzhou vitality north stream

Talking is only a sign of high emotional intelligence, and the core of high emotional intelligence is sincerity and kindness. Without these two points, talking again is just clever and offensive.
Author 丨 Sister Mo
I wonder if you have noticed that young people pay special attention to topics related to emotional intelligence at present, for fear that their emotional intelligence is not high enough to offend people and delay things.
In Mo's opinion, the so-called high emotional intelligence actually means to speak well.
Take a real example that I saw recently: A friend went to visit her aunt's house, and it happened that day that aunt's son brought his girlfriend home. The friend said casually: This child, like his father, would pick!
In just one sentence, all four people were exaggerated, and the aunt was smiling with joy. Would the aunt be more pleased if she changed to ordinary compliments, "This girl is so beautiful", "Your son has vision", and Lara mixed up with the polite words in the scenes?
Talking is a science, and learning and practicing can only rely on experience, own and others. Talking with a sense of proportion is an art, which best reflects one's basic cultivation.
The recent hit drama "The Name of the People" is a group of "human spirits."
Gao Yuliang
Know who you are talking to
Who is the highest emotional quotient and the most talkative person in The Name of the People? In all likelihood, they will vote for Secretary Yuliang.
He is best at "seeing people talking and seeing people talking." Treating leaders, competitors at the same level, students' subordinates, and old leaders who have no power varies from person to person, and each has a set of countermeasures with great results.
For example, before reporting to the leader Sha Ruijin, he enthusiastically expressed "the report of the Secretary of Ruijin hits the spot," and also specifically stated the content of the report, and "prepared to organize the province's political and legal cadres to study."
For the work of leadership, not only in-depth attention, but also their follow-up feedback, this is the highest level of flattering.
Moreover, this "sincerity" is not easy to come by. The secretary Sha who came from the air blocked the ascendant path of Secretary Yuliang, and everyone changed his mind.
The secretary of Yuliang, however, wiped out the "useless spirit", and became more and more "looking like a gall". This deep-water wolf is elusive.
For his own competitor Li Dakang, Secretary Yu Liang will make "Tai Chi Hand".
Li Dakang's men Ding Yizhen were investigated for corruption. The arrest order was issued by the General Administration of Anti-Corruption of the Supreme People's Procuratorate, and the Secretary of Yuliang will not add any clues. Instead, he will openly inquire about everyone's opinions, "the official business", dripping water.
He also kicked the ball to the senior secretary Ruijin. "Although it was said that I would break the camera, it still has a tendency." In the end, the enemy Dakang, the political opponent, was identified with a soft and firm attitude.
There was also a time of head-on conflict. Secretary Dakang was anxious to catch the director of the wind factory, Cai, who had been controlled by Secretary Yuliang. Facing the questioning, Secretary Yuliang was righteous, "How can I interfere casually?"
Uncle Da Kang knew that he had been tricked and had to eat crickets.
To the students Qi Tongwei, the secretary of Liangyu taught others, "teachers, preaching, teaching, and solving puzzles."
Minister Qi privately complained "If the teacher is to be the secretary of the provincial party committee," he warned that "the words must not be arbitrarily spoken." For students trying to please their competitors, they also laughed and said, "Be careful."
Again: What people should n’t say before, do n’t say anything behind.
When the student had little experience and did little things, and when the contradictions between the government and the people were aroused, he even left the scene early and scolded him stupidly, criticizing him for "being on the scene, you must show your courage and responsibility", which is obviously inferior to that of Dakang what.
The student regretted that he did not associate with the old cadre Chen Yanyan as soon as possible, and the latter had a deep friendship with the new provincial party secretary Sha Ruijin, and asked if he should visit him?
The teacher disagreed, and experience said that "it's better to be quiet than to move."
Every time I heard Yu Liang's "post-mortem analysis" of student Qi Tongwei, he pointed out the puzzles, had a strong heart, and was righteous. I felt very taught in front of the screen.
The most exciting thing is the attitude of Secretary Yuliang towards the old leader Chen Yanyan.
Chen Lao was once Gao Yuliang's top boss. Now he is just a retired cadre who has no power and has a high profile and loves things. Many people are afraid to avoid it. The secretary of Yu Liang does not despise or neglect. He also has a good personal relationship with this old man. Jokingly he doesn't serve bonsai.
There was no seriousness in front of others, and he laughed heartily, facing the old revolutionary temper of Chen Yanyan.
When Chen Yanyuan was on behalf of the Dafeng factory workers, Secretary Yuliang also listened to his opinions. On the surface, the secretary Yuliang was his soldier, respecting the old leaders, and a man of gratitude.
In fact, the secretary of Yuliang knew that Chen Yan's qualifications were old and powerful, "it's countless, and God can count". He can't be too full, leaving everything behind.
Had to serve, ginger is still old and spicy, juniors really learn a little bit.
Qi Tongwei
Too much force
"The Name of the People" is a big show staged among the official elites. All of them are not fuel-saving lamps.
But by comparison, the person who can't speak the most is Qi Tongwei, director of the Public Security Bureau. The characters in the play, Gao Yuliang, Chen Yanyan, Sha Ruijin, and Hou Liangping, "hit him".
Qi Tongwei was quick and quick, and his eyes were too alive. There was no steelyard scale in his heart, and he couldn't open the door. And he was surrounded by old rivers and lakes. If he was careful about him, those calculations seemed ridiculous.
He was a student and an apprentice of Secretary Yuliang. Before the teacher was promoted to the Secretary of the Provincial Party Committee, his attitude was "subtle", and secretly, he began to support and stand in line with the competitor Secretary Dakang.
Easily change the court, regardless of the pastoral apprenticeship. There is a word in the old saying, "Three family surnames", which derogates Lu Bu. The original surname Ding and the last surname Ding Yuan and Dong Zhuo Dong are capricious and loyal.
In the eyes of everyone, our Minister Qi also jumped into this rank.
Treating Chen Yanyan before and after Christine, in order to indirectly sacrifice Sha Ruijin, temporarily hold a buddha foot, ran to the nursing home to work as the director, the gesture of courtship was too blunt.
Compared with the casualness of his teacher, the phrase "Your old man can't wait" is really heaven and earth.
Even Chen Yan's wife, Aunt Wang, knew that Director Qi's hard work was shown to the new provincial party secretary Xiao Jinjin. Sha Ruijin also saw at a glance that he was playing at the scene, and the three went out to eat, without even letting the director Qi.
Quite sad.
On the student brother Hou Liangping, he committed the problem of covering his mouth again. He opened his mouth and said, "Close the door and talk, what did you say?" It directly bombarded the Sha Party Secretary of the Provincial Party Committee.
I originally wanted to "make friends" to win over Hou Xuedi, but did not know that Hou Liangping personally had a good impression on Secretary Sha and was difficult to recognize.
Later, Minister Qi again talked about individual heroism, ignored the masses, and even made Hou Xuedi, who came to investigate, even more suspicious. Even the businessman Gao Xiaoqin realized the embarrassing atmosphere at the scene and raised his watch and said that he was a common people, and the Minister Qi was also a common people.
As the saying goes: "Everyone only talks about three points, and they can't give up all their hearts." Especially before the anti-corruption director Hou Liang, who is in charge of anti-corruption of officials, although they were in the same department, they were not intimate friends. It must be lost, and the inner concubine should not show it easily.
In the face of the anti-corruption director with a righteous face and a Shang Fangbao sword, the more Minister Qi said, the more exposed.
There is another scandalous thing that Qi Tongwei makes people sneer at — crying to the grave of the mother of the former leader and making everyone stunned. This scene was not performed directly in the play. Li Dakang shook it out at the Standing Committee of the Provincial Party Committee and bluntly Qi Tongwei "relied on touting."
The past of Qi Tongwei's crying tomb was not only shaken out by Secretary Dakang as a laughingstock, but also exposed his charming style of beard-slapping. He could obviously eat on his face, but he learned snobbish eyes and wall grass.
Of course, there is the bad influence of the official style, but he is also stupid enough. In order to please the leader, he forced a crying grave in front of his colleagues. It is unreasonable and reasonable to see at a glance, but he did it too hard. I wonder.
He didn't realize his improper words and deeds. Not only did he end up telling the truth, but he also pitted his teacher. Secretary Yu Liang heard the story at the meeting, which was also quite embarrassing.
Confucius has a very incisive summary of the way of speaking: words that can be spoken but not spoken, are degrading; The knower does not lose sight, nor does he speak up.
The main idea is that a person can talk to him, but he is afraid that the offending person has not said to him, which is sorry; some people ca n’t talk to him, but they take heart and lungs from him, which not only wastes his tongue, but also easily offends people. A truly wise person should not lose sight or talk.
By this standard, Qi Tongwei is probably not a wise person. He has made many mistakes, which makes it easier to see through his own mind. He still does n’t know how to converge, but he is wise and misunderstood. I really do n’t know how such a person mixes with the director. of.
Hou Liangping vs Li Dakang
Respect and patience are the way to get along with each other
The stupidest thing in the world is too polite to strangers and too harsh to close people. The attitude towards family members can better tell a person's emotional intelligence level.
The hero of the play, Hou Liangping, took the initiative to ask for transfer after a friend's accident. His wife, Xiao Ai, was worried about his safety and didn't agree. He didn't debate and argue, but talked with her in a whisper. With affection.
He recalled his former friendship with comrades in the past, and expressed his emotion that if something happened to him, Chen Hai would definitely stand up because they were brothers.
Xiao Ai was impressed and promised with tears. Even if she was worried, she could not help but face such a kind and righteous husband.
The man praised his wife for "not holding back," Xiao Ai said, "In fact, I really want to hold you back, but I can't hold back."
In marriage, understanding the character of the other half, respecting and supporting his principles, such as oak and kapok connected by roots and leaves, "share the cold wave, thunder, thunderbolt, and share the mist, stream, and rainbow" are the souls that can join hands for a lifetime companion.
Hou Liangping did not suffer his wife ’s hard work and sacrifice. He spent his time buying gifts for her, cooking for his family, and communicating with his wife about his son ’s education before leaving. He kept himself safe, very vigilant, and did his best. Give your family a sense of security.
To the most familiar and dear ones, there is still respect and patience inside and outside the words, and they are willing to put down their candid exchanges, and spend all their efforts to resolve the worries of their wives. Only when you pay, you will gain something. This is the true high emotional intelligence.
The counter-executive secretary of Dakang, however, was unable to hold his own wife, which led to "long-term separation and eventually divorce."
He and his wife Ouyang Jing could hardly communicate with each other calmly, and the conversation was a little bit pointed to Mai Mang. In the final analysis, it is the two people who cannot understand and the three views are inconsistent.
Secretary Dakang is forgetful about his work, and pays little attention to his family. Ouyang Jing has grudges, thinking that he lacks love and security, and cannot be as happy as the heroine in a romantic love story. He would rather live in distress and resolutely not divorce.
Prior to corruption, Ouyang Jing demanded benefits for Wang Dalu, totally ignoring the Party principles of Secretary Da Kang.
The speech of Secretary Dakang, in her opinion, was a mantra of official speech and could not be heard at all.
At the end of the two, his wife Ouyang Jing said, "We are divorced, it has nothing to do with you", but deliberately fled by her husband's car, almost hitting her husband's political future.
Husband Li Dakang is also worried that his wife's corruption may affect his career.
The two people can be described as "the husband and wife are the same forest bird, and the calamity is about to fly." Although the secretary of Dakang is a reform general and the patron saint of GDP, he cannot handle even his closest relationship. The husband and wife lack basic warmth and understanding. In the end there was a cold war with each other, irreconcilable.
Although Li Dakang is righteous, he is not arrogant, and he can refuse to face his wife ’s unreasonable demands, but after all, he is a husband and wife, and his words are too decisive. In dealing with the internal relationships of the family, he lacks certain patience and skills, which is not an EQ High.
This is what Wang Dalu said, "You can't have both fish and bear's paw." Maybe it's the secretary Dakang who doesn't care about the circumstances of his family and can keep the bottom line politically.
Less routine, sincerity and kindness are the biggest emotional intelligence
"Talking and eating."
Older generations often teach their sisters this way. They treat all sides with exquisiteness, good words, and high emotional quotient.
Of course, this sentence is correct. People are social animals. They must learn to communicate and collaborate with others, but they cannot exaggerate the role of discourse.
My sister believes that speaking is only a sign of high emotional intelligence, and the core of high emotional intelligence is sincerity and kindness. Without these two points, talking again is just clever and offensive.
Superficial intelligence can speak, but it never reaches the truth and kindness in the bones.
For example, Gao Yuliang, who seems to be incorruptible and a public servant of the people, will also say the theory that "corruption is a lubricant."
If the mind is not correct, it is impossible to always be "Weiguang Zheng". There are always times when the chain is broken and leaks occur.
Qi Tongwei, who wanted to be the deputy governor, was a senior student in the Department of Politics and Law of Handong University. He was already in a mad state of mind. He just wanted to do everything possible to please the leaders to get promoted and make a fortune. Jumping beam clown.
He attributed his reasons for "becoming inflamed and invincible, to be complacent," to "there is no Lao Tzu who has the right and power," and he can only do whatever he can.
When he said that, how could he be worthy of the "good conscience" Prosecutor Chen Yanhua?
From the same farm, Chen Lao has always been able to hold the bottom line and be proud. After retiring, he still cared about the masses. Although he caused "official anger", the old man won the "popularity" by taking responsibility and integrity.
The male protagonist Hou Liangping almost didn't consider EQ externally, snorted with his subordinates, whistled a little whistle, and did not look like a leader; what did he say to his friend Chen Hai, and forced him to write an IOU, "owe a nest of corrupt officials".
Even so, in the eyes of Mrs. Gao Yuliang, he and Chen Hai are both their proud disciples, "how pure they are."
"The Justice of the People" is not only an unprecedented anti-corruption drama, but also a good drama that deeply reveals social reality. For example, the same alumni, Qi Tongwei and Hou Liangping can be said to be two sides of the same coin.
They all hold important positions, one mixed with the director of public security, and the other is an anti-corruption director at the deputy bureau level. The former relies on touting leaders to help the gang, while the latter relies on integrity and dedication.
People who work in government agencies or companies should understand that people cannot escape interpersonal relationships and office politics. At this time, knowing how to speak has become a key competitiveness. This is also the starting point for many people who want to learn about emotional intelligence.
Everyone wants to listen to what they like to hear. When dealing with other people, you must understand the appropriateness and skills, so as not to be offenders, flattering, and comfortable to do things.
But don't forget to be too late, talking with high emotional quotient is not tantamount to slick tongue, let alone thick black school, it is just a communication skill. To be a person in advance, the most important thing is to be sincere, and have a kind, sincere, and upright heart. Even if you do n’t speak so cleverly, with less routine and more sincerity, you can still be recognized from the heart.
Apart from work, love and friendship are also the same. A partner and friend who understands sweet words and discerns color is naturally pleasant, but it is also less real and lively.
At the end of the Ming Dynasty, the prose writer Zhang Jian had a quite contented saying: "People who are not addicted cannot be intersected, because they are not affectionate; people who are not foolish cannot be intersected, because they are not authentic."
Mr. Zhang Lao probably means that people who are sincere and sincere are more worthy of contact than people who seem to be perfect. They are the true emotional intelligence.
Would you like to be friends with Hou Liangping, an innocent boy who has hobbies, shortcomings, but integrity, or is a friend Qi Qiwei who is a smooth and enthusiastic boy?
? Source: Jiaren (ID: jiarenorg). Author: street sister, after 85 media people, "beauty" Public number (ID: jiarenorg) founder. Independently built a website, did a WeChat public account, and took a baking video. Motto: Just be yourself. Seeing an authorized release.

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