"Hit the table and hurt the baby!"
At the age when the child can walk and run, bumping and bumping is actually normal. I don't know how many times I want to touch a day. Of course it hurts, and the child will cry as soon as it hurts. This is a natural reaction.
But often at this time, the old man can't wait to rush up to pick up the child, hit the table and stool, and said, "Who wants you to meet our baby ..." The impact was negative: it was not my fault that I fell, it was the fault of the table stool! Do you still expect such a child to grow up in three provinces? Probably everything else is wrong!
"Don't tell your mother!"
Every mother wants her child to grow up healthy, so many times they will restrict their children from eating junk food that is bad for their health or prevent them from playing with toys that may be dangerous.
At this time, the old people should be on the same line with their mothers. But in fact, most elderly people ca n’t cope with their children. This formed the "Mom is not good for me!" Mentality.
I believe many mothers have visited the supermarket with their children and the elderly at home? Or at least I have seen such a scene: children can't help but want to eat all kinds of delicious food in the supermarket, jelly, candy, bulk cookies and so on! Sometimes they are too young to know that we have to pay for this thing, so we will get it when we like it.
At this time, the mother often stops the child and tells the child that he ca n’t pay without paying, but the old people come again: "It's okay, take one to eat! What does it matter to give him one!" As a result, the child took it for granted. As long as you don't take much, you can! ", And became a person like a" thief "!
"What does such a small child know!"
When the old man said this sentence, it really didn't make people want to explain! What did the child do wrong? The old man said that he could be forgiven because he didn't understand. The mothers taught the children to do their own things, but the old man said that the child was too young not to force him, it would be nice to grow up ... the child is very smart. Long, ask him to do something, maybe he will come up with a sentence "I'm still a little ..." Where does qq happen to be stuck?
"Your mom doesn't want you."
Are mothers particularly disgusted at hearing such words? But it doesn't seem to be so angry? Because they are obviously kidding? Children's world is much simpler than adults. They do not distinguish what is a joke from what is a fact. Maybe this is replaced by other unrelated people saying that it is not so harmful, but grandma or grandmother say it is different.
In the child's mind, they will only think that "even grandma said so, then the mother may really not want me", and then fear and sadness and various negative emotions quickly occupy the child's heart, and some may even have resistance to the mother!
"Don't eat well, I just ignore you!"
Threat is a common tactic used by old people, isn't there even such a bridge in fairy tales? In order for the child to achieve one of his goals, threaten him with things that the child is afraid of!
In this way, children are often obedient and obedient, even if they are not willing ... In the long run, on the one hand, children will lose trust in adults, and on the other hand, they will be conveyed to them "to make others obedient, you can use threats" Such a thought! Imagine that such a child can be honest and kind when he grows up?
"Don't move! Don't touch!"
Children are naturally active and full of curiosity. However, in order to prevent the child from messing up the house or avoiding some harm, the elderly often hang "Don't move, don't touch!" When watching the baby. In fact, this will limit the child's desire to explore and is not conducive to the child's growth.
在确保安全的前提下，允许孩子接触、探索一些物品，这样既保护了孩子的好奇心，也有利于孩子的天性发展。 The correct way is: on the premise of ensuring safety, allow the child to contact and explore some items, which not only protects the child's curiosity, but also benefits the child's natural development.
The old man took the child out to play with other children. When he saw other children who played better than his own children, he was often in a hurry: "How can you be so stupid! You should be like this ... Come, grandma teaches you!" The old man wants the child Well, we all understand, but saying in public that the child is stupid can easily hurt the child's self-confidence and let the child have an "I'm really stupid!" Inferiority complex.