hg50075.com A father's anger: Transferred to school after being criticized by a teacher as a child, "Daddy's image is more important than anything"

A father's anger: Transferred to school after being criticized by a teacher as a child, "Daddy's image is more important than anything"

Public number: Shayang Happy English Source: Time: 2020-02-21 01:35:33

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A friend of mine

Recently, Mr. Wang, who lives in Nancheng, Dongguan, was called by his son's class teacher to the school to criticize him. It is the second time that less than one month has passed. The last time he held a parent-teacher meeting, the class teacher and math teacher criticized him in public, which has made it difficult for him to let go.

This is not the experience of Mr. Wang alone. Mr. He's daughter used to study in a primary school in Guancheng. Once, her daughter forgot to take homework to school, and the class teacher criticized the child with him at the classroom door. "You can criticize me, but you can't criticize me in front of the child." Mr. He said, not long after, he transferred his daughter to school.

每个爸爸在孩子的心中都是非常伟大的,是孩子的榜样,我不能让人把孩子心中的爸爸形象毁了,这比什么都重要。 ”何先生说,这是他一定要女儿转学的原因。 " Every dad is very great in the child's heart. It is a role model for the child. I can't let the image of the father in the child's heart be ruined. This is more important than anything. " Mr. He said that he must transfer his daughter to school. s reason. Mr. Wang also fully agreed with his words.

Parents train in front of their children and transfer to school angry

Case number one

Mr. Wang's son, Xiao Ming (pseudonym), is smart and clever. Compared with his third-year classmates, he has "mature" that does not match his age. This was very obvious when he was in the first grade of elementary school the year before last: he refused to do his homework because the reason was that he would.

The teacher taught a lot of things he did, so he didn't listen attentively in class and talked to other classmates. This annoyed the teacher and criticized him many times. He still didn't change. For this reason, Mr. Wang was called to the school several times to hear the criticism of the head teacher in person.

He still remembers the first parent-teacher meeting. While the parents were waiting for the headmaster in the classroom, the head teacher came to him and criticized him. All the parents' eyes looked at him at the same time; after all, the head teacher finished the criticism The math teacher came and made him embarrassed again.

Less than a month after the start of this semester, Mr. Wang has been called to school twice by the class teacher. Because the child does not write homework, but the test results are always in the top ten; and because he claims to have a heart disease, he refuses to run. The teacher was so angry that he asked Mr. Wang, "Is there something wrong with Xiao Ming's head?"

Mr. Wang did not dare to talk back to the teacher, and did not dare to say a word of excuse. He only said, "Go home must criticize the child." He said that once the parents and teachers had argued, the teacher publicly said in the parent WeChat group, Then I will transfer more care to the other children in the class. "

Case two:

Isn't Mr. He in Wanjiang Dongguan equally distressed? At the end of the last semester, the exam was near, and the daughter in elementary school was so scared that she couldn't sleep because the class teacher was very strict and the children in the class had bad test scores, and they would be severely criticized.

Mr. He and his wife are busy with their work. Sometimes the child ’s homework is not available for inspection. The head teacher will call or publicly criticize the parents in the parent WeChat group. The teacher said, "Parents don't care, 5 + 2 = 0." Mr. He also didn't dare to make any criticisms. Looking at his daughter's fright, he didn't have the heart to criticize his daughter, preferring to be sandwiched by himself.

After being criticized by the class teacher at the same time as his daughter, Mr. He decided not to endure it anymore. He told reporters that his daughter had been studying in a primary school in Guancheng before and the head teacher criticized the parents every time. One morning, when he sent his daughter to school, he forgot to bring homework, and the class teacher directly criticized him and the child at the classroom door.

Mr. He put the child into the classroom and came out to communicate with the class teacher. "As a teacher, you can criticize the child and criticize the parents, but please don't criticize me in front of the child. Please don't let the child see her father's woe ". He turned away and left the stunned head teacher.

Mr. He runs a well-known restaurant company and manages hundreds of thousands of employees. "Dad is great in the child's mind. Teachers can't ruin the image of the father in the child's mind, that is not good for the child's growth." Mr. He said.

当众批评家长,老师也是不得已 Teacher ’s distress: criticizing parents in public

Give parents pressure to motivate more home-school cooperation

The teacher is really not easy. As long as the child enters the school, there will be competition within the class, there will be competition between the class and the school, there will be competition between the school and the school; there will also be competition among children's disciplines, which class of children are good, which class The child is mischievous; the child's overall performance and competition ... This all means that the teacher's performance is good or bad, and the teacher's pressure is not small.


From the perspective of the teacher, the education and learning of children is not just a matter of the school and the teacher. "If the parents do not cooperate and do not urge the child at home, how can the child develop a habit of learning? What the child learns in school is not a waste ? Now that the pressure of competition is so great, parents do not hurry up, what should I do? "


Understatement of communication, many parents are not attentive


Being criticized in public, the biggest feeling of the critics is of course shame. One teacher said, "Now teachers pay more attention to methods and methods. There are so few disregardful teachers. As parents, they ca n’t afford to lose face, but there is no such thing. Parents want to be so serious. Although they are criticized, wouldn't it be more educational if the child realized that he or she would be criticized for his own reasons? "


Many teachers are also parents themselves, and their children are reading. They are helpless in the face of reality. "We also expect to be responsible teachers, parents who are not blindly anxious, respect students, and protect children," said one teacher. "Understanding the teacher, distressing the child, in order to learn, it is painful and happy!"

Viewing the status quo: children are reading, parents and teachers are tired

Tired of parents:

More and more parents are lamenting that it is children who go to primary school, but parents are overwhelmed. "A lot of homework needs parents and children to do together. Children's homework must be checked by parents and signed by parents. Otherwise, children will be criticized by teachers and parents will be criticized." 老师的职责里没有呵斥家长这一条,学生在学校里有问题,老师可以同家长平等的沟通交流,不能动不动就带家长!” Netizens popularly said: "The teacher's duties do not scold parents. Students have problems in the school. Teachers can communicate with parents on an equal footing and can't just bring parents!"

"When we used to study, our parents never looked at our homework. Didn't we grow up well? Why are children now studying and parents are so tired?" Ms. Yang's daughter is also in elementary school, she said. Is the teacher Isn't it just doing this? Why is the responsibility now passed on to parents?

Tired of the teacher:

”成都市某小学班主任感慨地说。 "Teachers really shouldn't criticize parents in front of their children. But parents say that the responsibility of supervising the child lies with the teacher, and it is not right to put the entire responsibility on the teacher. The teacher takes 50 students in a class, exhausted, and the parents do not cooperate. "Whose child? Parents and teachers should grow up and learn. " Said the head teacher of a primary school in Chengdu with emotion.

The hard work of the teacher is obvious to everyone, with fast work rhythms, irregular work schedules, students' pressure for further studies, pressure on performance, various evaluations, job title evaluations, etc., which requires a lot of effort to complete. Although the teacher's responsibility is to teach and educate people, but this is not the only job for the teacher. Facing such a heavy workload, the teacher needs effective communication with the parents, but also needs the support and understanding of the parents.

Experts say: parents' prestige is impaired, affecting children's psychology

Of course, although teachers have all kinds of hardships, some experts pointed out that criticizing parents when the teacher is a child is not conducive to the growth of the child. Li Xinyu, director of the Department of Psychology and doctor of psychology at Zhejiang Normal University, said that many teachers overlook the positive function of education. The teacher criticizes the parents in front of the child, which is more serious than the child. "Parents' inherent position in the child's mind is exactly the basis for them to positively influence and educate the child. Let the parent's prestige and status in the child's mind be questioned and cast a negative influence in the child's heart. "

Li Xinyu said that in the education process, we should not pay too much attention to the negative side of children, but should discover and cultivate the positive strength and qualities of children. As a teacher, it is often easy to spot children's shortcomings and problems, while ignoring the positive function of education.

According to Zhong Jiaojun, in order to ensure the education of their children, most parents may be like Mr. Wang. Even in the face of extreme criticism from teachers, they still choose to be silent, while those who actively take the initiative to communicate with teachers like Mr. He Rarely. There is an old saying: "Respect the teacher and value education." There is also an old saying: "Poor parents in the world." In the grand plan of education, teachers, parents and children are all working hard. Therefore, when a problem is discovered, all we have to do is calm down, communicate sincerely, and discuss the advantages and disadvantages of various aspects in order to achieve a common goal.

If you have any good opinions and ideas on this issue, please leave a message to Zhongjiaojun.

(Source: China Education Daily ID: Zhongguojiaoyubao)

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